WHELM KING

My Background

I am a lifelong student of the human condition, with a deep interest in our patterns of thinking and learned beliefs. In truth, we are all the same. We all are born. We all will die. In between we seek love, safety, nourishment, growth and connection. My fascination with philosophy, ethics and zen, and my explorations of consciousness through meditation and psychotropics such as ayahuasca, have allowed me to create an accepting, peaceful and even curious relationship with death and dying. 

I was born and raised in Vancouver, BC and have resided on Vancouver Island for most of my adult life.  I have worked as a professional in businesses as diverse as arts management, law and agriculture.  I’ve run a radio station, started a farmer’s market and a high-tech aquaponics farm, managed international touring artists and a law firm, acted as senior business advisor to a multi-billion dollar corporation, sat on numerous boards, produced several music albums and published two books including a bestseller. 

To my life and my career I bring a beginner’s mindset. I listen intently and communicate clearly and candidly. I value honesty, eloquence and communication in simple language. I ask smart and dumb questions and I value both in myself and others. 

What all my diverse occupations have in common is people. I work with people. I engage with and study people. I help people and am helped by them. My path led me to Hakomi therapy, a form of experiential, body centered counselling in which I worked through my childhood relationship with my absent father and single parent mother. I later began training as a Hakomi counsellor, which I plan on completing as time allows. My path then brought me into the world of collaborative conflict resolution, mediation and coaching, which I came to understand I had already been practicing in my professional and personal life before my formal training at the Justice Institute of BC. I am a certified Grief and Bereavement Counsellor and End of Life Doula, and a member of the End of Life Doula Association of Canada.

Combining all I have learned and experienced, as a death coach I am honored to facilitate better dying and better living for my clients. It is a privilege to work with you in the delicate and vulnerable spaces around death, to which I bring my full presence and capacities.

About My Work

This work is a gift to me. I work with individuals, families and groups to explore all facets of what it means to be mortal, including:

• Our relationship with death

• Planning for death - our own or someone’s else’s

• Learning how to better support and connect with others who are dying

• Grieving in a way that is healthy for each unique client

• Resolving conflicts, both for individuals as a conflict coach and for groups as a mediator

• Understanding how to live the best possible life regardless of how much time is remaining 

My first objective is to develop a trusting relationship in which my client feels safe in exploring these sensitive topics, including becoming familiar with normally uncomfortable emotions such as fear, anxiety, sadness, anger and regret. Utilizing techniques from grief counselling, psychotherapy and experiential therapy, I help my clients peer behind the curtains of their emotions, to see the root causes and to begin reconciling them. My job is to create a container that allows fears and emotions to express themselves and be safely explored. This is a vulnerable and delicate space, and my commitment, training and experience is to facilitate it in a non-judgmental, kind and curious way. 

Often, fear or anxiety regarding death comes from our upbringing or past negative experiences. Witnessing a “bad” death, such as a loved one being kept artificially alive, feeling uninformed or disempowered about the dying process, or experiencing a death in which open communication and expression of emotions were discouraged, can create a belief that this is what death must look and feel like. 

It does not have to be this way. 

My work opens space to shift my client’s relationship with death, to allow effective grieving and an opportunity to express words so long unspoken and feelings disallowed or discouraged. I help my clients develop tools that are useful to navigate both life and its inevitable end in order to be more present and capable in life and in death. 

My wish is for everyone to have the opportunity to improve their relationship with death, to have the skills and capacity to be present in the dying of their loved ones, and to be more clear on what matters most in life and how to have the confidence to go for it.